Going the Distance for Your Long Distance Relationship

I've never personally been in a long distance relationship (because it really just seems like your pen pals with benefits), but for those who are in a long distance relationship, keeping it going can be really difficult. Not being able to enjoy the simplest of acts like going to dinner or even holding hands can be hard to deal with. And constantly worrying what your mate is doing while you're not there can really strain things. But fear not, your long distance relationship can survive. It might be a lot of work (you might wreck your phone bill and sprain your thumbs from all of the constant texting you'll be doing), but with this Howcast video your long distance relationship can be just as fulfilling as if you were sitting on your couch watching that funny Old Spice commercial together. Happy Dating!!!!

How To Maintain a Long-Distance Relationship on Howcast

Can You Read Your Way to a Better Love Life?

Lately, there have been two books about dating that have gotten my attention. They are both very popular books but one preaches a more common message while the other is spreading a message that some are seeing as slightly controversial.



The first, If I'm So Fabulous, Why Am I Still Single?: Ten Strategies That Will Change Your Love Life Forever. Written by relationship guru and the founder of the first university-based human sexuality program Susan Page, this book delivers ten dating strategies that are meant to help women identify their dating problems and fix them. I've only read a few pages of it, but seeing as how it's published in 18 languages and read in 25 countries this book must be saying something that women are identifying with.



The next book, Marry Him: The Case For Settling For Mr. Good Enough. This book is basically telling women that if they truly want to get married than they need to stop searching for Mr. Right and settle for Mr. Good Enough. In this excerpt, author Lori Gottlieb tells women this:

Whether you acknowledge it or not, there’s good reason to worry. By the time 35th-birthday-brunch celebrations roll around for still-single women, serious, irreversible life issues masquerading as “jokes” creep into public conversation: Well, I don’t feel old, but my eggs sure do! or Maybe this year I’ll marry Todd. I’m not getting any younger! The birthday girl smiles a bit too widely as she delivers these lines, and everyone laughs a little too hard for a little too long, not because we find these sentiments funny, but because we’re awkwardly acknowledging how unfunny they are. At their core, they pose one of the most complicated, painful, and pervasive dilemmas many single women are forced to grapple with nowadays: Is it better to be alone, or to settle?

My advice is this: Settle! That’s right. Don’t worry about passion or intense connection. Don’t nix a guy based on his annoying habit of yelling “Bravo!” in movie theaters. Overlook his halitosis or abysmal sense of aesthetics. Because if you want to have the infrastructure in place to have a family, settling is the way to go. Based on my observations, in fact, settling will probably make you happier in the long run, since many of those who marry with great expectations become more disillusioned with each passing year. (It’s hard to maintain that level of zing when the conversation morphs into discussions about who’s changing the diapers or balancing the checkbook.)

Hmmm, Gottlieb has definitely raised more than a few eyebrows with her call to settle.

These are two books with two pretty different dating messages. But whatever your dating philosophy, one of these books will be sure to appeal to you.

To Play or Not to Play the Hook-Up Game

To play or not to play the Hook-Up game, that is the question? We've all either had this conversation or have heard other women have this conversation about how traditional dating is no longer and that it's all about hooking up. It seems like now people hook up to see if they want to date the person rather than date the person to see if they want to hook up with them. Video killed the radio star and hooking up murdered dating. Will there ever be a time when people go on dates that don't involve them laying on their backs? I guess we'll have to see. In the mean time, here's a great instructional video on how to turn that one night stand into something more. Happy dating!

How To Turn a One-Night Stand Into a Long-Term Relationship on Howcast

Just Say No to Your Phone

Unfortunately, relationships end. Since we don't live in fairy tales, sometimes Prince charming ends up being a dick or maybe he found out that you weren't the nicest princess in the kingdom. Breaking up is hard, but what's really hard is trying not to call/text/email/tweet/poke your former boo. Maybe you're sitting at home watching a movie that used to be your movie and all of a sudden you're transported back to all the wonderful times you had before he said that he only dated you because he was trying to meet your hot friends and you said that you were a phony of the bedroom kind and you both said it was over. Well, here are six easy tips on how not to get in touch with your former.

Now if only there were six easy steps on how not to facebook stalk the girl you heard he was dating. Even though I showed you how to dig up dirt on the person you're dating, I don't suggest you do the same for the new girl.

Special: Lessons in Flirtling from an International Pick-Up Artist

So here's the scene: You're in the club and you see a hottie with a body that you absolutely can't take your eyes off of. What do you do? Picking up guys in clubs requires an extra special finesse that other settings (like a book store or a friend's party) don't call for. This is why I asked my friend the International Pick-Up Artist (she really is, her skills work across the world) to share some of her tactics.

First off, never go with the intent of picking up men. Your sole intent is to have fun with your girlfriends, dance it up and have a few drinks while you're at it. That being said, if you truly are having a good time and enjoying yourself, chances are, there's gonna be a cute guy eyein' you at some point. If someone does catch your fancy, my advice is, make eye contact. I know this is a given but some girls are too nervous to look a guy straight in the eye. I don't mean be all stalkerish but hold a glance for a second or two and let the edge of your mouth curl up; a little bit of a smile always helps. Once that initial contact has been made and you're ballsy enough to approach the man, from my experience, make silly conversation. Yeah, I said it, silly conversation. For example, if you catch the dude yawning say something like "late night for you?" or "that's not a yawn I see already is it?" If he seems like he's just kind of standing around ask him where his dance partner is or if he's afraid to bust out his best moves. If he doesn't smile or isn't intrigued in some way, he's not worth striking up a conversation with anyway. If he does bite (and he will, even if for just a few minutes) share a laugh and begin the conversation - who did you come here with? Have you been here before? What other places do you like to go to? Etc. From there, you should be able to get a vibe of whether or not you like this guy to continue the conversation and if he feels the same way.

So there you have it. With this advice, you should be able to end every night out with a fist full of numbers! Still unsure about how to implement these tactics? After watching the video below you'll be a pro. Happy Dating!

How To Flirt on Howcast

Can't Buy Me Love...But You Can Try!

It's a topic that everyone has talked about at least a few times in their lives, but few do so openly and honestly. When it comes to dating, does the number of commas in your date's bank account make them more attractive? Does money matter? Some women say "Absolutely not! My love is color blind which is why it doesn't matter this his credit card is black". But other women require a higher credit score than most banks do just to date them. So, I throw this question out to you: Does love taste better when it's eaten with a silver spoon?

Tiger Tiger Burning Bright, Having Affairs Always Causes Fights!

As if we need another person weighing in on the whole Tiger Woods debacle, but there's some thing else that I'd like to talk about: the fact that some of his mistresses want him to apologize to them. Banks can't trick people any more about their credit cards and mistresses want apologies from the people they cheat with? What the cuss?!? I think I have officially heard everything.

In all fairness, I can understand that these women feel hurt. Some of the members of Tiger's harem of them fell in love with Tiger and feel that he deceived them. Some of them want an apology because they feel that they don't deserve all the jokes, name calling and things like this being said about them. However, no one told them to get involved with a married man and to then go and share this information with the media. And because of all of this, some of Tiger's mistresses have gotten book deals, interviews and even jobs with Extra! So ladies, don't ask Tiger to apologize because if he did and you accepted it, it might make the situation even more awkward if you continued to benefit from your affair. The only person in this situation who really and truly deserves an apology is Elin Woods. Now that I've finished my rant, happy dating (and even happier dating if it's not with a married man)!

Creepy Crawly Creeps

Dear Guru,

I'm a 24 yr old female and don't date a lot AT ALL. I think its so contrived and creepy...is that normal? How many dates a week should I have be going on?

Thanks,

Creeped Out Over Creeps


Dear Creeped Out,

There's nothing abnormal with how you feel. Dating can be really daunting at times. The process of going out, meeting someone and then going on dates isn't as simple as they make it look in movies and television shows. It's weird and creepy to sit there with someone that you don't really know with the expectation that you're going to share yourself with them. Even sharing the most insignificant detail can be nerve wracking. If I don't know you, than you don't need to know that I got that scar on my left knee because I ate it while riding my bike when I was nine. That's a personal detail and no matter how unimportant that detail is, it still feels disconcerting to share that detail just because that's just what you "do" when you date. And yes, the whole situation can feel contrived. The whole "I'm out on a date getting to know you getting to know me" can feel like a bad scene out of a tacky rom com. But, with that said, it probably feels creepy because you're not that into that person. Not to sound like an after-school special, but if you really like someone getting to know them and letting them get to know you won't feel weird.

As for how many dates you should have a week, there's no magic number. I say as many as you want. When it comes to dating, I want your theme song to be "Boyz, Boyz, Boyz". But don't feel like you if you're not out being a lady about town that you're a loser. Sometimes it's better to not date than to date a loser for the sole purpose of saying that you went on a date.

Got a dating question? Email the Guru at thedatingguru6@gmail.com

How to Seduce Someone!

If you read the title of this post, do I really need to say more?!?

Read this article from The Frisky or try these suggestions from Wiki-How and tell me what you think.

Got a dating question? Email the Guru at thedatingguru6@gmail.com

Gift Limbo

Dear Guru,

Is it ok to give a guy something (a gift or make him present to be precise) for Valentine's day if you've only been dating for less than 2 months?

Sincerely,
Loving in Los Angeles


Dear Loving,

You are officially in Gift Limbo. Gift Limbo is when an important day that under normal circumstances would warrant gifting giving but since you a) haven't been dating for a significant amount of time or b)your status as a couple is "complicated" it is unclear whether giving a gift would seem appropriate. It's hard when you want to show someone that you care, but only just kind of. And I feel that Valentines day is especially tricky. Too much and you look like you've already picked out the colors for your wedding, but too little and you're boo for sure will have a stink face like "oh is this all I'm worth?" That's why you should give the No Fail Gift: A single Flower.

A single flower is perfect because it can be tailored to fit everyone's taste (just find out what they're favorite flower is), is appropriate for all occasions from birthdays to funerals and it shows that you care...enough. So this Valentines Day when he picks you up, hand him that single long stem red rose and watch him melt a bit as you enjoy the feeling of getting out of gift limbo. Happy Dating!



Got a dating question? Email the Guru at thedatingguru6@gmail.com

The Breakup Artist

So, I was reading this article about Boston-Based divorce lawyer extraordinaire Gerald Nissenbaum on The Frisky who in his pursuit to prevent divorces has come up with tips on how to keep an affair secret. Such pointers like not taking your cell phone with you on secret rendezvous (because of those pesky GPS chips that can be activated by spouses)and covering your tracks are just a few that were provided. Nissenbaum also has a book, Sex, Love, and Money: Revenge and Ruin in the World of High-Stakes Divorce about his life and times as a divorce lawyer for the people who weren't smart enough to cover their tracks.

For all you cheaters out there, how do you cover your tracks?

Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places…Until Now!

How many times have you said to yourself “dating would be a lot easier if I had someone to sift through all the losers, creepers and dummies!” Well guess what…someone has!! Time Out magazine has pulled other people looking for love and have made them available in one place. Right now they have hotties ready and waiting to date in New York City and Chicago. Time Out London, although not as extensive as the other two cities, can get you the hook up so that you can hook up as well. Happy Hunting!

*This is not an actual guy from Time Out. I’m sorry If I got your hopes up.

Flirt Like the Rest of Them

Dear Guru,

As someone who has a hard time flirting with guys, I find that the majority of the advice out there is really unhelpful. A lot of my friends are really good at it, so good that they can literally walk up to a guy and have them drooling over them in a few seconds. I want to have A game but right now I’m definitely an F student. How can I improve?

Kindly,

The Class Dunce

Dear Dunce,

Rest assure that you are not the only dummy in the classroom. I too have problems macking on guys and I definitely think that the majority of advice out there is super ridiculous. When I try to wink I look like I have a twitch and since I have short hair trying to toss it over my shoulder really just looks like I’m jerking my head from left to right. All in all, it makes for a hot mess of a situation. But here’s something new to try: flirting like a guy. Ever wonder why the grossest gremlin in the club is always hitting on women who are way out of his league? Maybe they're being delusional, or maybe there’s something more to it. Maybe they, and all guys have a tactic that we women should be prescribing to. Read How to Flirt Like A Guy and let the games begin! Happy Dating!

Got a dating question? Email the Guru at thedatingguru6@gmail.com

Lip Service

Dear Guru,

I was sitting in my apartment living room totally making out with this boy when all of a sudden he pulls away from and says that I’m a bad kisser and that maybe we should just watch T.V. WTF!! I have never in my life had anyone tell me that I was a bad kisser…but then again I’ve never had anyone tell me that I was a good kisser. What gives? What should I do?Sincerely,

Kissing and Confused

Dear Kissing,

Oh shnap!! That must of hurt pretty bad. It’s always hard to hear that your skills aren’t quite as good as you think you they are. But if I were you, I would see this as an opportunity to improve. Check out this How Cast video about kissing. I’m sure that after watching it you’ll be kissing like a champ! Happy dating!

How To Be a Good Kisser on Howcast

Got a dating question? Email the Guru at thedatingguru6@gmail.com